Showing posts with label family. Show all posts
Showing posts with label family. Show all posts

Thursday, June 16, 2011

by hand

Some may think it unnecessary work with modern conveniences like bread machines, but I really love making bread by hand. I don't do it that often, but I find it very satisfying (and delicious) when I do. I guess my reasons for this are many.

For one, living in an apartment with a tiny kitchen makes extra appliances, which require storage that I do not have, not very appealing. Plus, a bread machine takes away the satisfying part of bread making: kneading the dough. It's an excellent exercise if you're feeling stressed, upset, or any number of other things. Plus, I can see the progress as I work the dough from a sticky or floury mess to a smooth ball of dough. I find it fascinating that five simple ingredients - flour, salt, yeast, water, and oil - can make so much deliciousness.

Another thing I'm realizing about bread making is that it makes me feel more connected with family. My mom always made bread when we were growing up and would sometimes rope us kids into helping. I remember the smell of bread baking in the oven and how it was always (even now) such a treat to get that first slice as soon as the loaf was cool enough to slice. Her mother made homemade bread too. Even now, I think grandma still makes all her bread from scratch. So now, when I make bread, I mix the dough in a stainless steel bowl that used to belong to my great grandmother (my mom's mom's mom - did you get that?), and I wear an apron that my sister bought me. And so when I make bread, I'm perhaps just a little closer to all of them.

Thursday, September 30, 2010

unfolding my soul

"Introspection means talking to yourself, and one of the best ways of talking to yourself is talking to another person you can trust, to whom you can unfold your soul. One other person you feel safe enough with to allow you to acknowledge things—to acknowledge things to yourself—that you otherwise can’t. Doubts you aren’t supposed to have, questions you aren’t supposed to ask. Feelings or opinions that would get you laughed at by the group or reprimanded by the authorities."

~ Excerpted from "Solitude and Leadership" by William Deresiewicz, from The American Scholar

I love that idea that by being open with another person about the inner workings of your soul is really a form of introspection. Rather than make broad assumptions, I'll just speak for myself here. I only rarely meet someone with whom I connect with so deeply that I feel like I can share all of myself with them. With most people I hold part of myself back mostly because I'm unsure of whether they'll accept all of me or even be interested in knowing me that intimately. Perhaps others connect deeply with people more frequently, but I suspect that isn't the case. Perhaps each of us is only meant to have that deep connection with a few people in our time here on earth.

At this moment, I'm just feeling very grateful for the ones who know me from the inside out and love me all the same. They're worth holding on to.

Sunday, August 02, 2009

graying

More depressing than finding those first white hairs is shedding full-length ones. I've been getting white hairs since I was 21. I credit the gene that causes early graying to my father, who grayed quite early. I used to studiously pull out my white hairs, and they are truly white not gray, but I've long since given up on that. There are just too many of them to waste time hunting them down. Of course, if a white hair happens to make itself too noticeable, it will be plucked out in an instant, but that is a different scenario.

Those of you with blond or lighter-colored hair are quite lucky because your hair tends not to gray as quickly, and even if it does, the color-contrast is so minimal that your gray and white hairs are probably unnoticeable. Not so with darker-shades of hair. Fortunately, while I have more white hair than I'd like, most of my hair remains its original color, so you wouldn't really know about all my white hairs except that I'm blogging it for the world to read.

To get back to the beginning, however, it was utterly depressing for me realize that I was shedding white hairs along with my brown ones. It was as traumatic as finding the first white hair. Not only did the shed hair exist, but it existed long enough to grow to a foot or so in length, live a full hair lifespan, and be shed naturally just as a colored hair. Ugh.

If you think I'm exaggerating or being a bit melodramatic, you probably haven't been "blessed" with your first white or gray hair yet. Just wait. Someday you'll understand.

Wednesday, July 29, 2009

trip pics

So much for posting during the trip. I had time but lacked the motivation to think about blog posts. All in all, it was a great trip :) I just wish it hadn't flown by so quickly although I think my bank account is thankful that it ended when it did.

Leg 1: Visiting Derek
I started out driving down through Virginia and Tennessee and then heading north to visit by older brother, who lives on the border of Tennessee and Kentucky. The trip down was uneventful barring an all too excellent stop at Foam Henge and the mandatory check engine light that always pops on when I visit my brother. Odd.

Foam Henge


Derek & me


Leg 2: Visiting Meghan
Next on the agenda was a trip up to the Indy area to visit Meghan and finally see Ella for the first time. I couldn't let Meghan have her next baby before I'd had a chance to meet Miss Ella. It was a wonderful (but short) visit :)

Ella Bella


Meghan & me


Leg 3: Conference in Chicago
My conference was good and more filled with meetings than usual, but of course, the best parts of the Chicago visit had nothing at all to do with the conference. I got to catch up with some old friends from library school, go to a Cubs game at Wrigley, and do a bit of sight-seeing in the city. I heart Chicago. It's most definitely in my top three cities category (which is unranked).

Wrigley Field at Night


The Chicago Tribune + American Gothic


The Old Water Tower


Leg 4: Back Home
I have no pictures of the drive home even though it lasted 12+ hours. For this leg of the journey, I at least had some company since one of my co-workers "hitched" a ride back with me. And to round out the trip nicely, my check engine came on again right before I got back to Virginia.

More vacation pics are in my Picasa albums.

Sunday, July 05, 2009

road trip!

In less than 12 hours, the grand, amazing, super, spectacular road trip of 2009 begins! It's a rather circuitous road trip this year, including stops in the following pitstops:

* a visit to my brother in Kentucky
* a trip to IU for research and reminiscing
* a visit with Meghan :)
* a library conference in Chicago

And after all that, I'll drive back to H'burg. It will be a whirlwind trip, but I think it will be fun. I'll try to blog and post pictures along the way, but I make no firm promises on this. I did just get a new digital camera (woohoo!), so I may be inspired to post more frequently because of that.

I'm mostly packed. The car has had its pre-trip check up :) Now it's time for bed...

Monday, March 02, 2009

happy day!

My older brother is returning from Afghanistan tomorrow! His plane is scheduled to land at 4:30 p.m. Yippee!!!

Thursday, December 18, 2008

fat suits and stairs

Sometime over the summer, I was driving and listening to the radio, when I heard the DJs talking about favorite childhood memories. They put the question out to their listening audience for people to call in: what is your favorite memory from childhood?

I kind of spaced out after that, but it got me thinking about my favorite childhood memories. The first thing that sprang to my mind was a game of sorts that my brothers and sister and I used to play. Around Christmas time mom would decorate the house for the holidays and winter gear would emerge from storage. Part of the decorations included greenery and lights wrapped around the banister in the hallway.

Now when it's cold and nasty out as it gets during Midwestern winters, kids tend to go just a little stir crazy. This was before video games, computers, and 100+ channels had become part of family life, so my siblings and I became very good at entertaining ourselves. We came up with this game where you had to crawl down the stairs head-first. We did this during other times of the year too, but it was more fun at Christmastime because of the lights.

During winter we also added another element. Going back to the winter gear... Since my dad works in agriculture, we had an unending supply of feed jackets (Pioneer and SuperSweet) lying around the house. One jacket in particular was this enormous (either XL or XXL) red jacket that was way too big for anyone in the house. We would stick our legs through the arms, zip the coat up, and wear them as pants. Because they were massive, we would then stuff the body of the coat with blankets and put another coat on top and zipped that up as well.

The result? We were enormous when we wore the stuffed coats, and in our kid world, it was the funniest thing ever. We were like little Sumo wrestlers. Then we would combine the hilarity of our "fat suit" with the fun of going head first down the stairs. The coats made the stair game all the more exciting since the stairs were uncarpeted and the jackets were made from a slick fabric. I'd imagine it made our game a bit more dangerous too.

I realize that our game was really silly and certainly not very politically correct, but we had endless fun playing it.

When my sister was out visiting in late July, I mentioned the radio show and the DJ's question. Before I even had a chance to say what my favorite memory was, she blurted out that her favorite one was the fat suit/stairs game. I love that we share the same favorite memory. It was such a simple, ridiculous game, but shouldn't childhood be simple and just a little ridiculous at times?

So now I ask you: what is your favorite memory from childhood?

Friday, October 24, 2008

ties that bind

I have a large, extended family that is quite spread out, both in terms of geography and age. With 25 first cousins, it's difficult if not impossible to keep in touch with each and every one of them. The oldest is probably over 40 at this point and the youngest closer to age 5. My siblings and I happen to be right in the middle of the line up on both sides of the family. Given our position in the middle we know both the youngest and the oldest of the cousins, which may not be true for those on the extreme ends of the age spectrum.

I may not know each and every one of them well, but no matter what we will always be family. I recently became "friends" with a couple of my older cousins on Facebook, and it has been an interesting experience to say the least. This lets me learn about their lives (or at least their lives as they present them online), but it feels somewhat strange to learn about my family through a social networking site.

Perhaps more than anything, their pictures affect me. I can't look at their faces without seeing the faces of other family members. One cousin looks exactly like her mother while another resembles one of my uncles and one of my brothers so much that it's unnerving. There is certainly something to be said for family resemblance. However much we may or may not know each other, there is no denying genetics.

And there are things that I've learned that may not have surprised me but break my heart. I won't go into them here, but suffice it to say that despite the differences in age and the geographical distance between us, I would have wished and hoped for something very different for some of them. And then I see the family resemblance and think about how close we all really are and how statistically that could have been any one of us. It makes my heart heavy, and yet family will always be family.

Thursday, August 14, 2008

where i've been

Hi! I haven't yet disappeared from the face of the planet, but I apologize if it has seemed like I did. There have actually been blog-able things happening in the past few weeks, but I never seemed to find the time to sit down and write about them. Sigh. Rather than rehash the minute details of everything, I'll give you the highlights, or I'll end up being hopelessly behind forever.

Since my last post...

I helped Diego move from one apartment to another. Many boxes were lifted. Many pieces of furniture were moved. Many things were thrown out. Many muscles were made sore. But my lovely boyfriend bought me an hour massage as a thank you :)

Diego and I went to Michigan for the wedding of one of his close friends. The interesting thing about this was that it was a Muslim wedding. Having never been to one before, I was quite interested to see what they're like. They're quite different from Christian weddings and may warrant a separate post in the future. For now, you can see the pictures here.

Stephanie came to visit for a week. It was wonderful having her here :) We did some of the touristy things around DC (Smithsonian, monuments, the zoo, Georgetown, and old town Alexandria) and then headed to the H'burg area so she could see where I live. We shopped for bridesmaid dresses, went to the Shakespeare Theater, and saw Monticello. Pictures will be forthcoming.

And...

I went back to work on Tuesday. Sigh. Poor me. However will I survive! But seriously, I was very spoiled having 3 months off, but I knew at the beginning that it wasn't a permanent thing. Still... it's a bit sad having to work full-time again. I'm planning to ask my supervisor if I can work from home on Fridays so I can make faster progress on the book. I'll let you know if he OKs that.

Wednesday, July 09, 2008

happy, happy

For those of you who haven't heard, my sister is engaged! She called me on the evening of June 26 while I was still in Reno. The conversation went something like this...

me: Hey! How's it going?
Steph: Pretty good... What are you up to?
me: Not too much. I'm just packing my suitcase, and then I'm going to get ready for a night out with the girls since it's my last night in town.
Steph: Oh, that sounds like fun.
me: Yeah, it should be.
Steph: Well, I won't keep you long. I just have a quick question for you.
me: OK
Steph: Will you be my maid of honor?

Of course the answer was yes :)

I'm really excited for her and Justin. They've been dating for about 1 1/2 years now, and we all figured he would propose any time now. They're just really good together - they balance each other well and bring out each others' best qualities. So happy, happy for them both :) I can't wait for the wedding!


Steph & Justin with their snowman last Christmas

Wednesday, February 20, 2008

just right

The short story is that I've recovered from my illness (the doctor thinks I had influenza) and have returned from my trip.

The long story will probably never be written. I'm not good about writing about trips home. Some families get together to do things; my family gets together simply to spend time together. That involves talking and eating and watching movies and playing games and laughing about little things and just generally being around each other. That was really the point of the entire trip, and it was enough.

We ate wonderful home cooked food. We caught up with each other in person instead of through e-mail or over the phone. We learned a new word: weanus (the loose skin around the elbow). We laughed and played games. We ate jelly beans early since we won't all be around at Easter. We said some really sad goodbyes on Monday morning, knowing that we won't all be together again until after June 2009.

So I would end to say that it was good to be home. That might be about all I can say.

Tuesday, January 29, 2008

change of plans

I had been planning to visit my older brother in Kentucky before his company ships out to Afghanistan. They were initially scheduled to leave at the beginning of April for a 15 month tour of duty. Tonight I found out that his company will deploy a month earlier than initially planned. At first I thought I wouldn't be able to see him at all before he ships out, but it's looking like I'll be able to fly home and see him there (he's taking a brief leave in South Dakota in the middle of February). I just have to see if I can move a class that I'm supposed to teach on February 15. I think it will be doable. Well, I'll just have to make it doable because I wouldn't regret not teaching that class but I would certainly regret not seeing my brother before he heads overseas.

Wednesday, August 08, 2007

before i was dust

"When I was dirt" ... is how we begin a story that was before our time. Before we were born. Once we were dust and to dust we shall return. Ashes to Ashes, dust to dust. A cross on our forehead on Ash Wednesday to remind us this is true.

For a long time I believe my first moment of existence is when I jump over a broom. I remember a house. I remember sunlight through a window, sunlight with dust motes sparkling in the air, and someone sweeping with a corn broom. A pile of dust on the floor, and I jump over it. Feet jumping over a dust pile; that was when the world began.

When I was dirt is when these stories begin. Before my time. Here is how I heard or didn't hear them. Here is how I imagine the stories happening, then. When I was sparkling and twirling and somersaulting happily in the air.


~ from Caramelo by Sandra Cisneros

Whenever I go home, I try to make it out to Rapid City to visit my grandma. I know I shouldn't have favorites, but she's always been my favorite grandparent. She also happens to be the only one still alive, making it even more important to visit her.

One of the things I love about her is her stories. She has so many memories of the family and its history, going way back to before I was dust. I love sitting with her on the couch, flipping through old photo albums, and hearing her tell stories of people I never met but are my family nonetheless. There are certain ones that come up time and time again...

There's the story about my great, great, great grandmother, whose own mother, upon hearing that her daughter was pregnant for the 13th time, exclaimed, "Ack, Minnie, you ought to be ashamed of yourself!"

There's the one about how my grandma and her 3 sisters lived together in a room by themselves so that they could go to school in town.

Then there's the one about the time my mom and her family went to Wonderland Cave in the Black Hills. As soon as they got out, my Aunt Caryn cried, "I out, I out."

The stories may be small when taken one-by-one, but they're the stories that make up my past, my family, from before I was even dust. They're worth telling over and over again, worth remembering, because some day, someone else will need to be there tell the stories to new, younger generations, who are not yet even dust.

Wednesday, May 30, 2007

georgia weekend

Since it was a 3-day weekend and because my window of opportunity for taking this trip was rapidly narrowing, I drove down to Georgia this past weekend to visit my older brother, who is stationed at Ft. Gordon for the time being. He's been there since February, I think, and I just have not made it down there. There are only 2 to 3 more weeks to go before he gets shipped out to some other base somewhere else in the world, so I knew that this may be my one chance to see him. Once he gets shipped out it could be 6 months to a year (or more) before I see him again.

So I drove the 7+ hour drive to Augusta... there on Saturday, back on Monday. It was a really short trip, but it was totally worth it :)

Weekend Highlights:
* I added 3 states to the list of states I've been to: North Carolina, South Carolina, and Georgia.

* I bought Georgia peaches from a little old man who was selling peaches out of the back of his pickup truck at a rest area. Mmm...

* We went to Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End. Fabulous. Go see it. Now. I feel like the ending was a bit unresolved, which makes me think they might have a fourth Pirate's movie in the works...

* I got to explore the army base. It was much larger than I thought it would be although Derek said that it's actually small for a base. When you enter the base, you have to zig-zag through a series of gates. I wish I had thought to take a picture of it. The turns were so tight that 5 miles per hour may have been too fast a speed to make it through. To enter you must be with a person who has a military ID, and they perform check 100% ID checks for all persons entering the base, and they are serious about that 100%. On base, it felt something like a cross between a college campus and a campground, which makes sense considering the classes taught and training offered on the base. I also got to see the barracks. They were, um, stark... depressing... lacking imagination... worse than dorm rooms, but livable.

* We explored the Augusta Riverwalk. It's a park that runs through downtown Augusta along the Savannah River. It was great way to spend a lazy Sunday afternoon.


* Best of all I got to spend a couple days with my older brother :)

Monday, March 05, 2007

sick baby


This is a picture of my sister-in-law and my nephew. Daniel turns 3 on Saturday. I almost have a hard time believing he's already that old. Funny how time flies like that.

Unfortunately, Daniel was recently hospitalized for respiratory problems. I don't know what the exact problem is or how long he'll have to stay in the hospital. Hopefully, the doctors will release him sooner rather than later. If you could keep Daniel in your prayers, I would really appreciate it.

Thursday, March 09, 2006

just so you know

I have the best little sister ever :)

Wednesday, October 26, 2005

not so much a baby anymore

Today is my baby brother's 18th birthday. He may not be a baby anymore, but in some ways, he'll always be the two year old I used to sing to sleep at night. Happy birthday, Aaron!

Saturday, October 15, 2005

if you can't stand the debate, then get out of the kitchen

In my family, or at least on my mom's side of the family, we debate things. Not just big things but everything. No topic is safe from being hashed out in a friendly debate.

Last week my mom and I got into a debate over Arminianism and Calvinism. At one point we even acknowledged that we were actually advocating the same position but in different terms. Did that mean that the debate was over? Of course not. My grandma and I could probably get into a lengthy debate over whether pie is best eaten warmed up with ice cream on it or room temperature without ice cream. No joke. Like I said, nothing is safe from debate.

The other thing you should know is that the point of these debates is not to "win" or be right. The most important thing is to make sure that the other person understands the position from which you are arguing. If my grandma and I did debate how pie should be eaten, we wouldn't do so with the intent of persuading the other person to change their position. But it would absolutely matter that at the end of the debate, we each felt that the other person understood what we were saying.